Is It Normal That I Can’t Understand My Child’s Speech?
Do you ever find yourself thinking, “I understand my child, but no one else does,” ?
We often hear this concern from families in Virginia Beach when children start preschool or daycare. Some children are just harder to understand early on, while others may need extra support to improve speech clarity.
So how do you know what’s typical… and when it’s time to be concered?
Quick Answer: Should You Understand Your Child’s Speech?
By age 2, parents should understand about 50% of what their child says.
By age 3, parents should understand most of their child’s speech— about 75%.
By age 4, strangers should understand almost everything— about 90-100% of the time.
If your child is talking but frequently misunderstood, especially beyond age 3, it may be a sign that they need speech therapy.
Why Some Children Are Hard to Understand
Speech clarity (also called intelligibility) depends on more than just “talking.”
Children may be difficult to understand if they:
Are missing or replacing speech sounds
Simplify words (e.g., “tar” for “car”)
Leave off ending sounds
Speak quickly or quietly
Have difficulty coordinating sounds together
Use sound substitutions that persist longer than expected (ex. “wing” for “ring”)
It’s important to know that many speech sound errors are normal early on, but they should gradually improve with age.
Common Parent Question: “Why Can Only I Understand My Child?”
Parents are experts at translating for their own children.
You:
Know the routines
Anticipate what they’re trying to say
Fill in the gaps automatically
Strangers don’t have that context, so if only familiar listeners understand your child, that’s an important signal worth paying attention to. So, if you went to that birthday party last weekend and found yourself translating more often than not for your child, this is a sign they may need speech therapy.
When Is Unclear Speech a Concern?
You may want to consider a speech evaluation if:
Your child becomes frustrated when not understood
Teachers, family, or friends report difficulty understanding them
Your child avoids talking or lets others speak for them
Speech errors haven’t improved over time
Your child is 3–4 years old and still hard to understand
You find yourself translating for your child often
Trust your instincts. Parents are usually right when something feels off.
Age-Based Speech Clarity Guidelines (Easy Reference)
By age 2
Parents understand ~50%
Strangers may understand little
By age 3
Parents understand most
Strangers understand ~75%
By age 4
Speech should be mostly clear to everyone
Occasional errors may still occur
If your child is not close to these ranges, speech therapy may be helpful.
Will My Child Outgrow Unclear Speech?
Some children do improve naturally, but not all.
Speech sound difficulties that persist can impact:
Confidence
Social interactions
Early reading and spelling abilities
Classroom participation
Early support can:
Improve clarity faster
Reduce frustration
Prevent future academic challenges
Speech therapy doesn’t mean something is “wrong.” It means your child is getting tools to communicate more clearly.
What Happens in a Speech Evaluation?
A speech-language evaluation looks at:
Speech sound development
Intelligibility
Oral motor skills
Language understanding
Communication confidence
You’ll leave with:
Clear answers
Specific recommendations
A plan of whether therapy is needed or not
Even if therapy isn’t recommended, many parents find peace of mind in knowing where their child stands.
The Bottom Line
If your child is talking but difficult to understand, especially beyond age 3, it’s worth looking a little closer. Speech clarity should improve steadily over time, and when it doesn’t, early support can make a meaningful difference.
If you’re seeking pediatric speech therapy in Virginia Beach, VA, a licensed speech-language pathologist can help determine whether your child’s speech development is on track. Families are encouraged to schedule a speech evaluation to receive personalized guidance.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it normal for a 3-year-old to be hard to understand?
Some errors are still expected, but most speech should be understandable to familiar listeners.Should I wait until kindergarten to address unclear speech?
Waiting can make progress harder. Early support is often more effective. In Kindergarten, children are learning to read. If you’re child is having a hard time producing speech sounds, they likely will struggle with learning to read and spell those letters.What if my child understands language but can’t say words clearly?
This is common in speech sound disorders. Good language comprehension can help children respond very well to therapy.
This article was written by Kelly Shotts, M.S., CCC-SLP, pediatric speech-language pathologist and owner of Resolute Therapy Collaborative in Virginia Beach, VA.